Sunday, August 31, 2008

{ Boogers, Blood and Cow Snot }

AKA ~ My weekend in a nutshell.

I took the kids to the MN State Fair on Saturday night. Pickleman was working at his booth (deep fried pickles) so we stole him away for an hour so he could hang with us. I know he misses the kids when he isn't with them so this was a great way for him to spend part of his Saturday. While we are divorcing, we are still close and want to keep doing things as a family for as long as we can.

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I stopped at Walmart on my way down to the fair to buy a harness for Booger. Now before anyone chastises me for putting my kid in a harness, I will ask that you spend one hour with him in a crowded place and let me know if you can do it without a harness. I left the stroller at home on purpose as trying to navigate a stroller in the fairgrounds crowded with 165,000+ people is damn near impossible. Therefore, I went with the harness. He looked so damn cute in it too! I got many compliments from people, many asking where I got it and even kudos from a few St. Paul police officers. They have had way too many missing child reports during the last ten days of the fair and were very happy to see mine in a harness. So there. *sticks out tongue*

*wink*

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We took the kids to the different animal barns ~ cattle, horses and sheep. The cow barn is my all time favorite. This particular visit ranks low due to a cantankerous cow blowing his cow snot all over myself and Thing 1.

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Side note ~ I saw TONS of kids wearing Thing 1, Thing 2 and even Thing 3 tshirts. LOVED IT! Must get me some...

Back to the cow snot. Dude ~ It was effin' NASTY. Pickleman just laughed his nuts off at us. Thing 1 got the brunt of it due to her height. Regardless, I felt violated. And slimey.

The kids just loved seeing all the different cows. I made Pickleman take a pic of a calf nursing on his Mama. I thought it was so sweet. Cows are too cute!

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The horse barn was super boring but we were lucky to see a few hours outside on the streets. Evan has never been this close to a horse before. He loved it but was also a tad scared by how big they are.

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After an hour, Pickleman had to go back to the booth. I attempted the kiddie ride area and promptly failed. It sucked. The kids (excluding Booger) went on two rides and that's all I could handle. While they were on one ride, Booger tripped and fell, skinning his knees and getting one hell of a nasty bloody nose. He was crying and rubbing his nose which spread the blood everywhere.

I must say that I was most impressed with myself for I didn't panic. I just walked to the nearest bench (thank you to the couple who saw us coming and got me some paper towels) and took care of his bloody nose. Poor poonum. About 30 minutes later I noticed the blood all over myself. Nothing screams SEXY like blood.

I met Pickleman back at his booth around 9pm. While we were waiting for him to finish up, we snacked on some gourmet deep fried pickles. What constitutes them as gourmet, you ask?

There is cream cheese involved.

Oh hell yes. Gourmet all the way!

Anyways, Booger LOVES condiments. Since the pickles are served with ranch dressing, he only ate the ranch dressing. SO GROSS. What was even more disgusting was the fact that he kept putting his hand in the ranch dressing and then wiping it all over me. I had ranch dressing everywhere from the boobs on up.

As for Sunday, Booger lived up to his name. We were snuggled on the couch watching Thomas the Train when he picked his nose and wiped it on my lips.

Cue gag reflex!! I am very distraught over this. I'm wondering if I can get a lip replacement??

*wretch*


Looking at these photos from the fair, I'm reminded of one of my favorite photos of me, Thing 1 and Thing 2. It's from the MN State Fair in August 2004. It's funny what four years can do to you.

Then:

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Now:

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Sigh. I want to be skinny again.

~xoxo ~

2 comments:

A said...

you look super tone in the new pic, so take that back!!

and boogers on your lips. i am gagging for you! my boyfriend looooves to torment me with things of this nature.

so glad you had a great time with your family at the fair~!

ann

acomedianswife said...

I singlehandedly kept Pickleman in business this summer. I bought like 20 pickle pops. Those things rock! You have to hook me up! lol

Great pics! Why do the kids have to grow so fast?!?!?!