Monday, January 29, 2007

*Love, Elsie*

Okay, I will!

WOW ~ I checked out Elsie Flannigan's blog tonight after taking a break from blog-reading for a few days. Her new line of scrapbooking products debuted at CHA this past weekend. How fucking adorable is it?? I must have every piece in it, even if I never use it. It's just so cute! Unique, funky and totally Hunzer.



Only TWENTY-FOUR days until yours truly officially enters her thirties.

Only THIRTY-SEVEN days until I meet Aaron Lewis!


The littlest man in my life is almost four months old and ready for baseball season! It's really too bad we are moving to a state with no professional sports teams, muchless a MLB team. *sigh*


Wednesday, January 24, 2007

Practically PISSING myself with excitement!!

My husband kicks some serious ass. Yours truly turns 30 years old on February 21st (yes, write that down...I expect birthday wishes).

He surprised me with my birthday gift tonight when he got home from work.

Here's a hint...

Yes, that is me and Husband in the FRONT ROW

Need more?

How about now?

My husband is the FUCKING BEST!! Not only did he get me front row tickets to see Aaron Lewis during his solo acoustic tour...he got me Meet-n-Greet passes to meet the man himself!! I've seen Staind three times in concert between August 2005 and August 2006. This will be different since it's just Aaron but I've seen video of his acoustic songs and they rock.

I know I sound like a crazed teen fan of New Kids but seriously ~ this man and his band have been SO EXTREMELY therapeutic to me in the last year. I associate my stepdaughter and her passing with Staind's "Chapter V" album. When I'm bummin', I listen to Staind and get out of my funk. Hell, when I'm happy I listen to Staind and stay happy. This band is my therapy and I'm so excited that I get to meet the lead singer. He pours his whole self into his music and lyrics...he kicks some serious ass.

But not as much as my Husband does!! Thank you Bonz!!!

Tuesday, January 23, 2007

It finally came!!

(No pun intended)

My new bar t-shirt...

The description on their website says:

If you buy this you're disturbed.
If you wear it you're sick.

WOOHOO!!! I *love* offensive shirts. I love wearing them out to the bar and seeing people's expressions when they read them. It's all for shock value baby.

Here are the other three shirts that I bought, the last one being for my brother (he turns 25 on Thursday):

A fellow St. Paulite and kick-ass scrapbooker Extrodinaire, Miz Cathy Z, pointed her readers in the direction of THIS t-shirt today. I love it.

I'm so easily amused.


You can find the first four shirts at Tees for Tards.

You can find the last shirt on Mighty Girl's blog.

Sunday, January 21, 2007

You're Invited!!

Ultimate Blog Party

Now's your chance to party like a Hunzer! *wink* Click on the pic above to see the dirty details and join the fun.

I will be one of the crazy ones at the party that makes the quiet/shy ones cry into their jamba juice while the crazy and outgoing ones rock along with me, spilling their drinks on the nice white carpet. I will make the religious ones pray for my soul while the non-religious ones help me get comfortable in my handbasket (and hey ~ EVERYONE is welcome in my handbasket). I will make the gigglers giggle, the wafflers waffle and the timid ones run screaming out the front door wondering what in the HELL they did in their lives to deserve meeting me?

Well, I will do this as much as I can over the internets.


Still sounds like a fun thing to do though ~ Join me! (Do me a favor, if you are going to join me, post a comment here so I can come check out your blog!)


(Now I'm craving a Jamba Juice in the worst way!)

Thursday, January 18, 2007

Another one bites the dust.

Another toothbrush, that is.

(For those that aren't familiar with the toothbrush incident of '01, you are missing a good one. Short version ~ my toothbrush ended up in my husbands sweaty asscrack during a bathroom war.)

Now for today's toothbrush manifesto...

My four-year-old son was sitting on throne taking a deuce in my bathroom. I stepped out of the room to get something and when I came back in, my son says "Mom, look."

These words, spoken whilst on the shitter, are never good...but I looked anyways.

THANKFULLY, he was pointing at the counter and not his ass but there, on my bathroom counter, RIGHT NEXT TO MY TOOTHBRUSH and other necessities, is a piss-soaked roll of toilet paper.

Seems the kid dropped the entire roll in the toilet. I don't know if this was pre-deuce or post-deuce. All I know is that there was piss water all over my bathroom counter, creeping towards my makeup brushes after it sloshed over my toothbrush.

One trip to Target and $100 later (FUCKING TARGET), I have a new toothbrush and some new toothpaste.

By the way, if you are in the market for a new toothbrush, I highly recommend the new Oral B Pulsar. My teeth feel AWESOME. I did notice, whilst brushing, that this toothbrush could double as a G-Spot massager. The shape, the vibrations...but for now, it's staying in my mouth (no buttcracks either!!)

Wednesday, January 17, 2007

What ~ You didn't know I was a crack whore?

Last night I watched the first episode of this season's American Idol. Being in Minnesota, I was especially interested in this episode since it was the Minneapolis auditions. Normally I hate reality-tv but curiousity got to me and I had to watch.

Thing 1 and Thing 2 watched with me while Thing 3 napped on my chest. The kids got bored and started to play. Suddenly Thing 2 (age four) says "Hey Mom!"

I said "What honey?"

"I'm a crack baby."

Um, WHAT?? Apparently he had been listening when one of the contestants on American Idol said she was a crack baby.

He repeated it over and over for about half an hour. I told the story to his preschool teachers today when I picked him up. Thankfully, he didn't tell THEM that he was a crack baby.

Tuesday, January 16, 2007

Snip, tape, crop, SCREAM...snip, tape, crop, SCREAM...

I'm a procrastinator. It's no secret. I hate deadlines that are given too far in advance. I tend to forget about them, even though I have daily reminders, and then need to bust my ass at the last minute to meet them.

I managed to finish 170 wedding invitations over the weekend for my friend's wedding, which is on February 24th. I feel guilty that it's so close to the wedding but shit ~ she didn't even buy envelopes until today! AND, in my defense, I told her I would do this in JUNE and to get me the info before I had the baby. I got the info well AFTER the baby was born. It's both of our fault, really. Two procrastinators should not be allowed to collaborate on a project.

I am a member of the Ready, Set, Create! Creative Team. It's an online scrapbooking magazine. The deadline for the Feb/Mar issue is looming. I'm 38% finished with my submissions. Yes, I realize that I am a total nerd for figuring out the percentage but hey...I majored in Finance ~ whaddya gonna do?

I have to finish 52 cards for a card swap by Sunday night and mail them on Monday morning. I am making two cards, 26 of each design. One card is finished and ready for mass production. *wink* The other card is half-finished. I was working on it at 4am and could no longer process anything in my mushy head.

On the back-burner, I want to knit my three-month-old son a had to fit his ginormous head. He's adorable, yes, but the kids has NO hair in the middle of a Minnesota winter. All his baby hats are too small for his melon. I think his head just looks big due to the lack of hair. At least, I hope that's the reason. Seriously though ~ he's adorable and just needs a bigger hat for his three-month-old head. The highs around here are in the single digits to teens lately which is chilly for a baby, even in a heated house.

So I have to scrap my ass off, make a buttload of cards and knit a hat for my kid on top of trying to figure out how in the hell we are going to move to Arkansas without me going in to a full-blown anxiety attack.


Monday, January 15, 2007

Mommmyyyy...I want my mommmmyyyy!!!

I googled the phrase "You are a Nerd" tonight in google images. I figured it was a safe enough phrase that nothing nasty would pop up.

Then I clicked on page 2 of my results.




I will never be the same.

I want my Mommy!!!!

Thursday, January 11, 2007

My 4yo son scared the bejeezus out of me.

He crawled in to bed with me this morning around 5am. He's been under the weather the last few days but has seemed okay the last day or so.

Around 8am, I went to move him over to my husband's side of the bed. When I rolled him to his side, he just flopped over. He didn't move on his own accord at all.

It brought back vivid flashbacks of the morning my stepdaughter died. My husband and I doing CPR on her...I can't even type it all.

I almost screamed when I saw my son "flop" like that. I shook him awake and he gave me a look like "don't EVER wake me up like that again!"

I don't care. It was worth it for me to see you open your eyes. I love you little man.

Saturday, January 06, 2007

I'm blue.

I'm warning you ~ I'm having a pity party for myself tonight. It happens. I try not to do it too often but I'm human. I have been told that I'm not always forthcoming with my emotions and put up walls so people don't know the real me. The last two years have hopefully changed that but I am, and always will be, a work in progress. I may cuss like a trucker and offend everyone around me but deep down, I'm a real person with real feelings. *end Oprah moment*

I feel like most everyone around me has forgotten about Amanda (my stepdaughter who died on Valentine's Day 2006). One of my best friends, Annex has been so wonderful and talks about Amanda with me, asks about her memories, and lets me talk about Amanda without getting weirded out by it. Most of my friends do not bring her up unless I talk about her. Of the Xmas cards we received this year, maybe TWO of them (out of the 75 to 100 we received) made mention of our first Christmas without Amanda. Now, I understand it is hard for some people to talk about but it is not hard for US...her parents. We mentioned her in our Christmas letter this year and will continue to do so in some way each year of our lives. She is our daughter...and always will be whether she is here or not.

Annex gave me a beautiful bookmark with Amanda's picture in it. I almost cried at the restaurant when I opened it. She thought of Amanda and that means so much to me.

Our REALTOR mentioned Amanda in his Xmas card. Granted he's a family friend but our REALTOR mentioned her for fuck's sake!!

The other card that mentioned Amanda was from my inlaws. Of course they are going to mention her. My parents didn't send a card this year but I know they would have mentioned her as they loved her as much as we did.

I got this in an email today from friends in response to our big news that we are moving to Arkansas...

"I'm very happy to hear your news. But it is bittersweet! If only it could have been here in Minnesota. It will seem different with you guys not being here. I know we don't see you very often, but you guys are in our thoughts. Especially this year with the loss of Amanda. Sorry that it took this opportunity for me to acknowledge that."

Don't be sorry ~ Thank YOU for acknowleding that.

I don't know what the point of this is. Maybe I'm venting. Maybe I'm stressed out. Maybe I'm depressed.

I know what it is.

I feel like people are FORGETTING AMANDA. PLEASE don't forget her. Don't forget her 1000 watt smile. Don't forget her giggles. Don't forget the unconditional love she gave to everyone she knew. Don't forget how hard she fought each of her thirteen years. Don't forget that she has two sets of parents and SEVEN total siblings that are missing her more than anything in the world. Don't forget that there is a piece of me, a piece of her Dad, a piece of her Mom...a piece of us that is missing and will never be replaced.

Just don't forget her. Please.

Hunzer and Manders, circa 1997

Wednesday, January 03, 2007

Fucking men. They have an answer for EVERYTHING.

I was exhausted tonight. I wanted to go to bed at 10:30pm but made myself stay up until midnight to get some shit done. I went to bed and here I sit two hours later, wide awake.

This fucking move has my brain in a tizzy. It's a *good* tizzy but a tizzy nonetheless.

Our youngest child is three months old. He's the only one of our kids that will soothe himself with a pacifier.

Yes, I'm going somewhere with this.

As I'm tossing and turning in bed, the Husband rolls over and says "Hey Hunzer ~ you know how the baby will toss and turn in his bassinet but once he gets his paci in his mouth, he falls right to sleep? Well, my penis..."

After I stopped laughing, I gave him a kidney punch and got out of bed.

Fucking dork.


Tuesday, January 02, 2007

Do Arkansotans exist?

If not, I'll be the FIRST!!

The Husband O'Hunzer has been promoted at work meaning we are packing up our shit and moving to Arkansas.

I have never lived outside of the Twin Cities metro area minus the entire damn state! Same with husband.

I also have never been to Arkansas. Husband has been there a few times for work. We are headed down later this month for house hunting.

I'm keeping a very positive outlook on this but let me just say...


And now I will be positive again. :)