Friday, December 08, 2006

The funniest shit I've ever read in a Holiday Letter...EVER!!

This letter is from an elderly Aunt whom I never see. My Mom actually got the letter but I'm just saying I read it to make the story easier to tell.

The letter was your typical Debbie Downer Holiday letter with major health problems for my elderly Uncle, etc. My Mom was reading it to me and each line just got worse and worse.

Then she read this one.

"Sadly Petie, our singing canary, died of a heart attack while I was clipping his nails."

I lost it. I was laughing so hard that I was in tears. My Mom says "Yep, that's when I lost it too."

My question was "Can you even clip a bird's nails?"

My Mom's question was "How in the hell did she know he had a heart attack?"

Then the clincher:

Remember Petie on Dumb and Dumber?
"Our pets' HEADS are falling off!!"
"Pretty bird, pretty bird."


just for those Eddie Murphy "Delirious" fans...

My Great Aunt's name is Bunny.

No shit.

I have an Aunt Bunny.

and she's comin' to git me.




dont eat token said...

I love walking around singing "Pretty bird, pretty bird"

EatCrayons said...

Shooooooot, I need that shirt!